Confessions of a tired nobody

So, we’ve all done things we’re not proud of. And if you’re in congress right now, you do things you’re proud of that most people think you should be arrested for. But I digress.

I recently had a great idea for a website where I would publish one startling personal confession a day for public pondering. Being lazy, I thought I’d just turn it into a blog post here and save us all the trouble of having to register a URL, design it, and promote it. And by “us all”, I mean Dan.

So here are a few things I’ve done in my life I think the public should know about.

• When I was a kid I remember secretly hoping I’d find out I was adopted so they could make a movie about my hunt for my real parents.
• I'm secretly proud when my kids learn a new swear word. 
• I borrowed my friend's honor role tassels when I graduated from high school so my parents would think I graduated with honors.
• I have sent myself hand-addressed letters in the mail before.
• I use my kids as an excuse for being late all the time but the truth is I was reading crap on the Internet and lost track of time. 
• I have had a closet love for the Backstreet Boys ever since I was 14. I still can only listen to them when I think nobody is around.
• My kids have peed the bed at night and I've just thrown a towel over the sheets and put them back to sleep. 
• I knowingly let my son go to kindergarten in underwear he's worn for multiple days. 
• I've pretended my kids aren't my kids in public on more than one occasion. 

I’m sure you’ve all got some skeletons in your closets. Mine are dancing around and having a party.